not my favorite Easter

Traditionally we go to friends’ for Easter brunch.

We hide eggs for about 15 kids. We eat a lot, drink a lot. My friend, who is diabetic , drinks too much and gets louder and louder- until it becomes a fever pitch and it’s time to leave.  Last year I broke one of their lawn chairs. Ugh I thought, really?

Today I went to church, worked with the children’s program – where kids had a feast.  Everyone pitched in to make it a nice event , memorable. When we got home, our kids looked for eggs- a little taller & more skilled this year, but still little!  Time ticked furiously, I could rest before the party.

And then my broken heart returned like a wave crashing on my head. It began really hailing outside. I burrowed deep into my fleece blankets and thought of who I would truly be pleasing at our scheduled brunch.  These aren’t my fm true friends, sadly that would understand my stress- that we are in crisis behind our masks and I am hurting and grieving alone.

So I stayed home. I slept a lot and tried to nurse myself back to peace.  My children were disappointed.  MI wasn’t too successful in hiding my depression from my family, but at least I didn’t put myself in the spotlight, pouring gas on the fire at the brunch.  I gracefully texted my friend, told her the half truth that I wasn’t feeling well… And let it go. Next Easter has got to be better than this one.




3 thoughts on “not my favorite Easter

  1. Sometimes we put so much pressure on having wonderful times for holidays. Sometimes a holiday is just a day when we don’t feel wonderful. I’m glad you did what you had to do for yourself.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s